Today is my seventh day off in a row. So far, January has
been the polar opposite of December as far as working is concerned. I like to
say and think that I’ve done a lot, but aside from some heavy lifting,
cleaning, and driving, I’ve actually been able to relax for a few hours here
and there. This morning, I woke up a little later than usual, at 7:11am, but I
decided to roll around and just ease into the day so I stayed under the covers
for another hour. It was glorious. But, my instinct to go, go, go kicked in and
I wanted to write a post, go to the gym (today is back, shoulders, and
treadmill), make lunch (yesterday I went to Sun Foods and bought the
ingredients to make some Pho, today I will try to be equally creative), do
laundry (Still catching up from my vacation), clean my room (don’t even know
where to begin), and read some of my new book, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance (I’ve only gotten half of
a chapter into the supposed classic novel, but so far I just can’t get into it;
it’s boring and I can’t relate. I’m going to stick it out, though, because I’ve
not seen nor heard a bad review).
Yesterday my boss from the laminating factory texted me and
asked if I wanted to work Monday and I replied, yes! I filed for temporary unemployment
during this down-time which I was approved for, but I would much rather be
working than sitting around trying to think of things to do on unemployment.
This is the first time I’ve been approved for unemployment after answering all
of the questions truthfully. Of course, if anybody from the unemployment office
is reading this that sentence was entirely fictional, and I would never dream
of defrauding such a legitimate institute.
Here’s another fictional story, about a friend of mine,
whose name also happens to be named Vince. Incidentally, he was also arrested
on December 20th, 2013 at the Super8 Motel on south Broadway in
Rochester. Hmmm, lots of similarities there. Well, no need to look into that
any further, especially if you’re a government employee.
Anyhow, I tried desperately to get my friends, accomplices,
and even acquaintances to bail me out of jail. I didn’t really like it in
there, and I wanted to be back out on the street, presumably as a homeless drug
dealer. At the time, I was receiving unemployment because I was laid-off for
the winter as a seasonal worker at a restaurant in Lanesboro. I came up with a
stunning plan to communicate to the outside through a combination of letters,
phone calls, and visits, the exact combination of information needed to have
somebody apply for my weekly unemployment benefits until my account reached the
point where they could withdraw a check, have it sent to a bail bondsman, and
ultimately pay for my release. I only spent 35 days in that jail because of my conspiratorial
strategy, compared to my co-defendant, who stayed in for eight months. I was
pretty proud of myself, and I went right back to using and dealing for six more
months before finally being sentenced to prison. Er, I mean my friend did all of that, my
friend Vince.
Overall, living honestly weighs a little lighter on the
soul. I can’t even imagine being so devious now, but there really is no need to
be that way. Actually, it was kind of neat filling out the forms and knowing
already that I would be approved, and that I didn’t need to fear any of the
envelopes that would be arriving from them at my house.
In the end, if I do go back to full-time work next week, it
will all have been for naught because of the one-week waiting period during
which I cannot receive benefits. I will have to suffer that week without pay,
but fortunately I’m doing well enough that I won’t suffer any permanent damage.
I can still do what I want, buy what I need, and go where I please. And for
that, all I can do is smile.
