No Move Is A Good Move?

If only for a few days, the thought of moving out of my mom's house for maybe the sixth time in my life was constantly on my mind. But, alas, the whole idea has been scrapped. I was looking forward to making the next step but it sounded more like the same step to me. More like a sober house than a rental house, the landlord is constantly at the residence, "checking things out". At first he made it sound good, then I heard from one of the guys that actually lives there that somebody that had been using drugs was allowed to stay as long as they paid another deposit. I don't want to be anywhere peoplepeople who are actively using drugs.

So, for now, I'm staying put. Next idea: buy a car. This just sort of developed over the past few days but I found a car through a friend on FB that she hit a deer with and wants to sell cheap. It has body damage but it runs well. I don't care how it looks on the outside because I plan on sitting mostly on the inside. It's cheap, $300. It's a step in the right direction, and it will make getting out of the house easier. It opens up a whole new world. I can get a gym membership, whick I could have already done but I only get an hour pass for exercise and to try to take a bus ..... No. It will help me utilize my precious little time out of the house more effectively, and I'm looking forward to that.

Today I went to Mickey's Diner for the first time ever. What a fun experience! The cook was amazing, not wasting any moves, conversing with customers, and making jokes at all the right times. We got to see a black man walk out all upset because his steak wasn't on the grill yet. The place was packed, but he claimed the staff was showing favoritism. Hahaha! Just like any restaurant, the cook goes in order. And when you're dealing with less than eight square feet of cooking surface, sometimes things can take a little time.

Now I'm in Woodbury. Willie is off to my side chewing on the rawhide I bought for him. I have a fire going in the kitchen, and I'm laying back on the couch, happy, content, full. My aunt went to Target to grab a few things and I'm going to show her how to make BBQ bacon, one of my specialties. I've spent the past few Saturdays with her and I have really enjoyed my time here with her and my cousins and of course, my dog.

One of this things I have hoped for for so long is a companion. Somebody to cuddle with, laugh with, and love. My dog would be a great way to fill that void in my life, but I can't have him at home. So I sit inside my head and hurt instead of going out to play with my best friend of years. He filled an emptiness for so long. And while I'm here, the emptiness is filled. Someday I will find her.

Ok now that depressing shit is out of the way!!.... Uh. I got nothin'. I'm running out of ideas for writing. Sitting at home a lot I suppose will do that. Have I written my whole life story already? I suppose when you leave out all the periods of black-out, and the things only I will ever know about, it must come to an end, right?