Today I used up some of my free time to go to my aunt Connie's house to do some work on my new car in her heated garage. It didn't go to well. I stripped the drain plug for the oil so I couldn't change it. But I did clean it up and put rain-x on all of the windows, one of my little obsessions in life. I love me some rain-x. Anyhow, I got a little surprise visit from my uncle Bill who is in town from California for the holidays. I was going to see hm tomorrow, but it was really nice to see him today. I hadn't seen him in roughly a decade and honestly I was a little nervous about seeing him. He's not really the type that understands my addictions, or so I've been told. But it went really well because we are family. He still has the sarcastic sense of humor I remember, and nothing felt in the least bit awkward. I can't wait for tomorrow.
When I first got out, all I wanted was to meet a girl and start working on a family of my own. But now I know that there's plenty of time for that. I need to re-establish my familial bonds that I wrecked through my absence, and I think I'm doing pretty well so far. I don't know why I was so afraid of my own family. They love me unconditionally and I know that now. These are the people that will always be there for me if I need help which I'm sure will happen eventually.
As far as friends, well, I don't have too many. My closest friends live two hours away which is still out of the picture for a while. They have come to visit me a few times which has been great. It shows me that they too still care for me and think of me even after leaving them for meth. Seth sent me a lovely/terrifying ugly sweater for Chanukah. It really is awful, and I love it. I'll be wearing it tomorrow.
I meet people in AA meetings, and I've reconnected with some childhood friends there that are now sober, but that's where it ends. I leave the meeting and I don't see these people until the next one. This will change in two weeks when my free time doubles from eight to 16 hours per week. I'll be able to go out for fellowship afterwards where I can have some fun. Trending is Cards Against Humanity and Bingo at Green Mill. I can't wait.
This Christmas will no doubt be better than last. I will be surrounded by family, my dog, and happiness. And although I do sometimes feel lonely and sad, I have the option to reach out to so many people whether by phone or by Facebook. I really can't complain about anything in my life that I have control over. I'm doing well and I am excited for each new day.
To all of you reading this whether you're a follower or a first time reader, take a look at your life and notice how much you have to be grateful for. I don't have much, but I have everything that I need. The things/people that I want will come with great change and effort. Something I have been tirelessly working at for 19 months now. Am I rambling on? I think so. Happy non-denominational holidays to you all. And to all, a good night.
