A Matter of Time

This is the only picture I took because cameras weren't allowed during the show.

 Last night I had the opportunity to go see my cousin Laura perform in a High School musical called, “It’s a Matter of Time.” First things first: I was absolutely blown away at the level of flair and imagination presented by these teenagers. From start to finish I was glued to my chair with wonder, astonishment, and occasionally maybe a piece of sand or grit got into my eye and some sort of fluid began to leak out. That happened almost immediately when they brought a piano out and a girl played a song called 7 years old. I had never heard it before, but I would imagine she offered it flawlessly.

I’m going out of order as usual because my memory doesn’t always serve me right. The first song was actually The Time Warp, which I’ve heard on the radio before, but I don’t know what it’s from. If I had to guess, every kid in the school was involved in this piece. They flooded the aisles and the stage and singing and dancing was all around me. It was a good intro for an even better show to come.

Next up a song called Seasons of Love. I had only heard a version of this song maybe in a commercial before but I’m fairly certain it’s famous for something. Only briefly, but for the first time ever I got to hear my little (not so little anymore) Laura sing. I now know what it means when somebody says, “She has the voice of an angel.” It was beautiful, soft, and sweet.  I was truly disappointed that she didn’t get more time.

I’ll skip ahead a few songs to one that I was quite captivated by. Cell Block Tango sounded like a classic show tune from a musical off Broadway. It might be just that, but I refuse to use Google for this post. My memory alone will try to paint the picture. Six girls sat in a row on stage, and I think the chairs were backwards. They started saying funny words like squish, snap, crackle, and pop. Maybe not quite those words, but close. Then they each told a tale of a mischievous man and how they killed them. It was funny, inspired, and undeniably entertaining.

And backwards I go again because I forgot about two solo acts that were really good. I have the program from the show in front of me now so hopefully that will keep me on track. Writing’s on the Wall and Viva la Vida were both sung powerfully, passionately, and from what I could tell, spot on. I can’t be held accountable for my lack of musical awareness pertaining to Broadway or Coldplay, but I do know a good voice when I hear one, and they had talent.

When was the last time you saw tap dancing? For me it was last night. And, it was the first time in my life I had seen it live and I was quite mesmerized. All of my skills either involve food or uh……. Hmmm I’ve got to be good at other things, more on that later. What I’m trying to say is that if I tried my hand (or rather foot) at tap dancing, I would surely break my leg and those of anybody near me. It takes dedication and practice to get to the level at which they performed, and they should be very proud of themselves.

Blast forward to Rocket Man, the only solo by a male last night. I was a little worried at first that he couldn’t hit the high notes, but sure enough, I was phantom-singing along with him half way through. He actually even kinda sounded like Elton, which I would take as a huge compliment. Keep singin’ kid.

I don’t have enough room to go over every performance, and I couldn’t possibly remember every minute even if I could, so here’s the last couple…

Transitioning us through the whole performance was a core of kids travelling through time in a Tardis as seen in Dr. Who. Between every song they would come out and say a few lines and meet up with various personalities in music history. I’ll just say that my favorite was Beyonce. Anyhow, right before every song, they would have a few lines which inevitably lead to them saying the title of the number to be performed. Numbers like 25 or 6 to 4. See, I did it! The Cabaret House Band played this ditty by Chicago quite well. The saxophone player got up front and center and showed off his skills in a little solo that got the crowd going.  

And I have to skip to a little a cappella originally performed by Billy Joel. I’m terrified of a cappella since I saw Rajaton dismantle the Beatles a few months back, but this was enjoyable and in tune. I never realized how few words I actually knew to that song until last night. I might have been good as one of the hummers, but I would look like a fool if I had to sing.

Overall it was an incredible evening. This is where I say how grateful I am for sobriety, and for being back in the lives of my family. I know I’ve missed a lot over the years but I’m trying to make up for lost time now. Laura if you read this, know that I love you and that I’m proud of who you are and what you’ve become. You have so much life in front of you and it looks like you’re on the right track. I’m sorry if this post didn’t do the show justice, I’m a work in progress!

Ladies and Gentlemen, The Beatles

The day began with me writing a blog post, much like I’m doing now. I rarely have the need or the ability to write two posts in one day, but I think today has the right to be explained right now.

My Mother and I have had plans for a while now to see Rajaton perform with the Minnesota Orchestra. The name Rajaton- pronounced RAH-ya-ton, meaning “boundless” in Finnish- perfectly describes the a cappella group’s eclectic style. I directly plagiarized that. I had none of those thoughts as I was listening to their music. More on that later.

I had made reservations at Hell’s Kitchen in Minneapolis for brunch which turned out to be a good idea because the waiting list was an hour and a half long. They also had live music which, in my ears, was very good for bluegrass. The food was a solid 8. The only things that knocked it down were that it came out too quickly, and it was not up to temp. As a starter, I ordered a cup of the Mahnomen Porridge. Native-harvested, hand-parched wild rice, heavy cream, roasted hazelnuts, blueberries, cranberries, and pure maple syrup. Fuck me. One of the best, if not unlikely, combinations I’ve ever eaten. Strangely, it came out two minutes after our food, which we had ordered five minutes after I put my order in for the cup. Whatever. I ordered the crab cake Benedict which, as I said, came out too quickly to be fresh, but the flavors were there, as well as the desired textures of a properly cooked crab cake. Good food and music, I will go back.

We walked through a Target store monstrosity where we looked at things that we did not need, and moseyed on toward Orchestra Hall. We arrived about an hour ahead of schedule so we sat around and people watched for a while, a favorite amusement of mine. The lights flickered, and it was time to take our seats.

I helped the fine people of Target create words with the random assortment of light-up letters they left me. I am so creative!

Very blue, as I stated above.

Smaller, and much bluer than I expected, Orchestra Hall appeared to be filled to capacity in anticipation of hearing one of the best albums of all time, Sargent Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band. The orchestra was tuned, the lights were lowered, and the important people came in, so we clapped. The “conductor” was an Asian woman. Not a very stereotypical Asian though, as she spoke perfect English and quite oddly, wove around only one chopstick which appeared to intimidate the band. Every time she waved it in their direction, their gasps could be heard through their instruments. I don’t know how it all works, but it was kind of neat.

Now, imagine if you will, six Andy Bernard’s. No, five of those and a David Brent, from the British version of the Office. That’s what Rajaton was. Now, imagine if you will, being trapped in an elevator for two hours with these guys where they turn the world’s greatest music into swing jazz, all lead by a well-bred Asian wielding a chopstick. That’s what I endured. Don’t worry, I’m okay.

I cannot say it was all bad. Their a cappella version of Eleanor Rigby was comparable in its own way to the Beatles. They are famous for a reason, and they do have great voices, they just weren’t John and Paul. The orchestra behind them was great, but again, they only followed the true music of the Beatles a few times.

The second set, after the intermission, was made up of several of the greatest hits. If there’s one thing I dislike about cover bands, or bands, it’s their greatest hits. I would love to have heard A Northern Song, Something, or just the orchestra play Flying. Songs that changed my mind about music when I was very young, and lead me to much greater music than Dr. Dre and Eazy-E, although they still have a place in my heart.

Overall, the day was a great one. We had been looking forward to this for a while. The original idea, of course, was squashed by my agents when they put me on restriction for a month the day before we were to celebrate my mom’s birthday by going to see a different show. It’s all behind me now, and I look forward to trying many new things that these cities have to offer. 

This is the first chance I've had in six months to dress up and go out. I'm looking forward to finding somebody to do things like this with more often (no offense, Mom.)